Mens’ 200 Meter Freestyle Final

Good morning, chickens! Good news. I’ve figured out why NBC flashed Dwyer’s times’ at the wall flips in Tuesday night’s 200 meter freestyle instead of Phelps. Not because they favored the vaguely reptilian swimmer, but because he reached the turnaround point first! Can you imagine?

And that smaller “AR” stat listed in the lower left? That refers to the time established for the “American Record” rather than “action required”. Go figure! Next I suppose I’ll find out the “WR” acronym stands for: world record, and not: waiver requests, wash room or even water-resistant.

Oh well. It’s all part of the fun of following a mostly fabricated blog, I expect. A blog that promotes the fictitious and its writer. You never know what kind of reading inaccuracies you’re gonn’ get! (said à laTom Hanks dba as Forrest, Forrest Gump)

But enough tiresome chitter-chat about fudged facts and far more interesting Spielberg movies. It’s time to interpret the highlights of the Wednesday night rematch between Lochte and Phelps, and this time, I guarantee they’ll be made up of 90% natural ingredients and only a  >smidge<  of filler.

All-righty. We’ve set the scene already: an Olympic-sized pool lanes number 4 & 5, and we know the players well enough: Lochte, Phelps & 6 other guys, though the surname of the repeat offender in lane number 7 bears mention, I think, as it’s as unlikely a moniker for a swimmer as any.

I don’t know about you, but the handle: Davis Tarwater conjures up images of slurries rather than hurry to me, but we’ll just have to wait and see. Overnight, if I know anything about asphalt. Continue reading →…