Uncle! (already)

We’ve been seeing each other

for a l-o-n-g time

since we were kids, and it

isn’t an exaggeration to say

our destiny is cradle to crypt

We’ve played together–

lost and formed teeth together–

learned and forgot together–

shared growing pains together, and

bonded in a way that’s damn near

patriotic in its idealistic fervor

So just when the abuse began is hard to say

–was it less credit for my contribution to keeping the dream alive?

— the grunt work generally left for me to perform?

— the eavesdropping on my every phone call?

I tried to believe that signaled caring

(and validated my usefulness in sustaining the relationship)

but I wondered

–briefly wondered–

since I still had stars

(and stripes)

in my eyes,

whether such tactics were less about love than power.

when the abuse intensified is easier to .pinpoint.

–the isolation from family & friends

–the insistence I stopped doing things I enjoyed that were viewed as threatening

–the demand I quit my job, and

the manifesting of a fear & uncertainty so real I needed to set extra places for them at the table.

Yes, Sam grows exponentially more controlling

the longer I stay true to him,

and if stats are correct

–it’s only a matter of time

before it becomes physical…