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Associating Randoms

 

 alarmclock04

Just remember: if fighting the hands of time, the hour hand is the ringer…packing the most punch.

 

Snapshot of Synapses:

Oh…<<is “H” superfluous

well…<<deep subjects

shit…<< vocabulary replacement

WAIL!..<<truth

O… <<circle of life

whale…<<deep objects

shit…<< imperative

 

♦ I have so many things to be greatful for—but spelling isn’t one of them

 

♦ manifesto, but woman fester ♦

 

♦ fiction and poetry is the craft of taking deeply personal emotions and events & twisting them—origami like—into art ♦

 

Sleeping Beauty

was a cutie

till her napping took a hitch,

burning candles

changed her handle

to Sleepless, Moody Bitch.

 

Appropriate response if someone stumbles over an autumn-man:

ottomanHave a nice trip? See you next fall

 

Ham-fisted Randoms

 
 

all the time

It used to be handfuls of ice-cream distracting a pedestrian on a summer day. Now it’s handfuls of iScream.

 

thoughts are worth a penny—ergo, everything makes ¢¢

 

when you write out the symbol &–can you write “ampers&” ?

 
Tormented by the incessant hammering of a construction crew working in the area day after day, when at last the pounding ceased, she wasn’t sure if she should: knock wood when thanking the Bigger Carpenter upstairs…
 

:mrgreen: a bad day being me is still fairly entertaining :mrgreen:

 

aweSUM = awesome, and then some!

 

if you’re feeling beat up…try to be more upbeat

 

If you get caught stealing from a palm reader—are you read-handed? Or just in cahoots…

miss you guys today

 
 

Random Randoms…

 
 

a networker

networking is a lot like talking to a friend that never removes his sunglasses

 

When asked why he failed to score a home run, Isaac spoke slowly, weighing his words: “I don’t have enough balls…What about you Nick?”

 

If eyes are the windows to your soul—and Bill Gates has a monopoly on Windows—are Windows the portal to your scroll?  Your ghoul?  the outdoors? Why aren’t they eyePC’s?

 

† angel hair is made from noodlesangel dandruff, from Parmesan 

 

The Whither Report

intense— intents— in tents

when it’s good, you’re a happy camper

when it’s up in the air, you’re Snowed in…

whither report

 
 

Unabridged Randoms

 
 

I missed erasing my former entry into Rogets today, and while I didn’t get a list of synonyms for the amalgamated  entry: especiallymagically —I did get a heckuva compound smile!! Perhaps its best definition…

 

Q: What did the insomniac snake take to sleepA: addervan

 

Medusa Airlines = The original motherf**king airline

 

when you think about it, Caesar ultimately had the first—and worst—Caesarean section

 

saving interface = editing comments

 

Joint Point: the area where one’s loins become one’s groin.

 

WordPress glitch = site-U-ation

 

bad cybrations = a sense your FB friends are talking about you

 

fart jokes: when you’re grasping at fingers….

 

Beware of folks who speak of themselves in the 3rd person.  The schizophrenic royal “we” can’t be far behind…

 

I’ve already deconstructed the Spanish greeting “ho-La” as better than the English term: o-hell—whoops, hello, now I’d like to look further at this mellifluous language. The word: “sonrisa” is another favorite term. Pronounced: Sown-rees-ah, it sounds like “sunrise” to me, but actually means:

sun_happy

smile.

 

Reheated Randoms

Karen Robiscoe as an author favorite

spinning =  1st gear uphill

♦ it’s little wonder “smarm” and “charm” rhymes ♦

♦ if someone digs at you, tell them to shovel it ♦

Luke was a good guy, and Mia was a hoot. But when those two got together? Man, they were toxic!  I mean, they always had a bone to pick…

duh-mazing = something so incredibly stupid it’s actually amazing, too.

♦ you can pick your character, and you can pick stocks—but you can’t pick the characters who stalk you

♦ The break-in at Microsoft was determined to have been committed by an industry insider. Apple’s apeel for bail was granted when they discovered Fresh Prints of Dell There. ♦

fresh prince

Can we crash here, Mars?
Our planet is done in, but
we won’t trash the place.

click HERE to send this message in a space rocket to Mars! Thank you, Earthlings…

Geekish Randoms

 
 

Karen Robiscoe is an awesome fiction writer

ERGGG-onomic chair—putting the ouch in my ass since it lost its last wheel.

 

♦ when you get old enough, you start appending ½ and ¾ to your age again ♦

 

prostitutes = more bang for your buck

 

♦ Greek Gods must have had a hella good gym to look so ripped ♦

 

Orwellian =  Oh wellian…

 

♦ it’s hard to showboat up shit’s creek ♦

 

Born Again Buddhist = Deja Vudist

 
 
 

Prah-greS

♦ Pretty soon spelling bees will become spell-check bees ♦

 

♦ instead of an emergency phone call in jail

you’ll get an emergency text option

 

They’ll re-invent the TV dinner, and dub it the “Monitor meal”

 

The new pocket pet will be your computer mouse

Karen Robiscoe is a humor author